The Right to Choose

I was not a happy pregnant woman. I was a screaming, shouting, crying, (binge) eating bitch on wheels who, by week 39, was researching natural means of induction to make the misery end. Up sixty pounds and down to my last nerve, I asked my doctor if they would consider inducing me on my due date. He refused - 'You don't want Pitocin, trust me! - but told me he would schedule a C-Section for 41 weeks if I was that desperate. I wasn't. It never occured to me that a vaginal delivery was a choice - C-sections were for emergencies, weren't they? Apparently not. Christina Aguilera told People magazine she schedule a c-section because of the horror stories she heard about tearing. My boss suggested that I schedule a c-section then I would know exactly what day I would be giving birth (which would help with planning maternity leave, one guesses). After asking friends, I found out a few wouldn't consider conceiving without knowing their doctor would perform an elective C. And I was - and am - horrified.

Entering into parenthood is the ultimate in unselfish acts. A biological mother shares her body for nine months before sharing her life for (God willing) ever with her child(ren). Before I even met my daughter, I endured stretch marks, hemroids, and heart burn that could burn the eyebrows off your face in anticipation of her arrival. As I type this, my pillow-y lower belly (now beautifully creased with purple stripes) rests softly on my keyboard, stretched beyond recognition of my former self. And she was worth it. Being a first time mother, you are facing the ultimate unknown and, quite frankly, labor was the least of my worries. I knew that at some point, "the time" would come and what would be, would be. I had concerns about if it would hurt (it did), if I would poop on the delivery table (I didn't), and the thought of an episiotomy was even more frightening to me then a natural tear (And tear I did). But most of my worrying was focused on the health of my unborn child, my untested parenting skills, the impact a new child would have on my relationship with my husband - I don't know, the things that really matter.

Parenthood has changed me in so many ways - physically, emotionally, mentally. And the process began with my pregnancy. If I can do it, you can too. If you're starting your journey as a parent by taking the easy way out, you're in trouble.